A great Outer Banks beach day is 80% logistics. Get to the sand by 9 a.m., set up in one spot, and stay put until after lunch when the little ones need a nap.
Bring more water than you think you need, two towels per person, a hooded cover-up or long-sleeve rash guard for the kids, and reef-safe sunscreen you reapply every two hours. A pop-up shade is worth its weight in gold from June to August.
For calmer swimming with young kids, consider the sound side at sunset or the lifeguarded beaches in Kill Devil Hills and Nags Head. On the ocean side, always check the daily flag at the lifeguard stand before letting kids in.